"As long as we think the next election might eliminate crime and establish justice or another scientific breakthrough might save the environment or another pay raise might push us over the edge of anxiety into a life of tranquility, we are not likely to risk the arduous life of faith."
Eugene Peterson
A Long Obedience In The Same Direction p.25
When Ray hits me with all the evils of the world--or more likely, the present administration 8-) I reply with my "canned answer:" But God is in control.
Part of that is self talk, to shake off my own fear, which rises faster than someone who just realized their alarm never went off. Yet my words are more than a bit hypocritical, as I discovered when I read Peterson's words.
My combined journal entry/prayer reads like this:
This is so me!
God, pull me out of this mire! I keep looking for the Quick Fix . . . the fix that will make me . . .uh . . . no longer dependent on You.
And I wonder, sometimes, why God doesn't answer my prayers? It's not because He doesn't love me. It's because He does. He desires me -- and you -- to remain close to Him; in fellowship with Him . . . dependent so that we experience His strength and His unfathomable --His very personal love for us.
"When the Lord your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you -- a land with large, flourishing cities you did not build, houses filled with all kinds of good things you did not provide, wells that you did not dig, and vineyards and olive groves you did not plant--then you eat and are satisfied. BE CAREFUL THAT YOU DO NOT FORGET THE LORD . . .
All the richness of my life is wrapped up in my relationship with the Lord, yet I keep trying to make Him unnecessary. I tell God, often, that I want to be dependent on Him, but I'm honest; I also tell Him that I HATE being dependent on Him. It's the wonder . . . how will He meet this need or desire? It's the wait . . . usually till the last minute. Both require faith. I want Quick Fixes. He wants ME.
But I am LEARNING to be . . .
Utterly Dependent on Him . . . Who Is Utterly Dependable,
Lonnie
